Parenting Advice from “The World’s Worst Mom”
Here at Adventure Nannies, we are huge fans of Lenore Skenazy, founder of the Free Range Kids movement and recipiant of the title “The World’s Worst Mom.”
The Free Range Kids movement is “fighting the belief that our children are in constant danger from creeps, kidnapping, germs, grades, flashers, frustration, failure, baby snatchers, bugs, bullies, men, sleepovers and/or the perils of a non-organic grape.”
Lenore became famous after letting her 9 year old son ride alone on a New York City subway. Her story became a media firestorm and critics were outraged. The incident prompted the Yale and Columbia graduate to change course and make start the Free Range Kids movement.
We were lucky enough to sit down with Lenore and ask her some questions about this unconventional philosophy.
AN- Did you ever have a moment of doubting yourself when the criticism started up? Was there ever a point at which you flinched at embracing the term “world’s worst mom”?
L- Yeah, It did feel terrible. Like, curled up on the floor, holding my stomach terrible. That’s how terrible. I was worried that you know… Im not immune to superstition, what if Im saying “Oh, im sure my son will be fine” and then God laughs and says “I’ll show you..”
So I did have to justify myself over and over again with everybody saying “why didn’t you think twice?” “why weren’t you worried?” and you just start worrying, of course I worried. But when I rallied I thought, “no, I’m not doing this without consideration, and there’s something really weird about a society that berates you for believing in your child.”
It felt like “who has convinced us that the more you allow yourself to think about catastrophes and kidnapping, the more you actually care?”
AN – In one article where you mentioned that the it’s a form of back-door anti-feminism to expect mothers to hover and monitor their children at all times.
L- Yes, it is so obviously something that doesn’t have to do with real safety. Ill tell you, 19 states have these laws against letting your kid wait in the car for any amount of time. In California its 0 amount of time, in Rhode Island they just tried to pass a law that nobody under 7 can be in a car at all, ever, without an adult. More kids die in parking lots then die in parked cars. So, its literally more dangerous to take your kid out. Its not VERY dangerous, but similarly its not very dangerous to let your kid wait IN the car. But somehow, one of them allows you to get a ticket, be forced to pay a parenting fine, and that is letting your kid wait in the car.
It has to do with the fact that one way, you’re inconvenienced which proves that even if something bad happened at least you were trying.
And the OTHER way, a mother is allowed to use her judgement and let a sleeping kid stay in the car, or let a 5 year old whos looking at an iphone can stay in the car, and somehow that is not allowed. You’re not allowed to use your own judgement, you’re not allowed to take your eyes off your kid. If you have your eyes on your kid you’re automatically a good parent. If you take your eyes off your kid you are automatically a bad parent. Even though we all know that’s not true, because our parents were good, and they took their eyes off of us.
Read more of the interview in Part 2!